Sunday, September 12, 2010

Ice Chewer on Hooking Up


"King of the class, I'd rather lay up with a hottie
Single doesnt mean Im lookin for somebody (I Hate College Remix)" 

"All the fellas nod their heads
All the ladies fall in love
Or in lust, either one baby i don't give a fuck
Uh uhh my tab's open, yeah (Tabs Open)"

Above, my fave Sammy Adams uneloquently references the nature of our fuck-it-all-lets-get-laid college party culture. I'd like to go ahead and disagree with his prospect that ladies can fall in love during the course of one night. It's very much only the lust option. Then again, it's not like he gives a fuck. 

A couple nights ago, I was jamming to Sammy, absolutely wanting to party while simultaneously berating myself for entertaining such slutty desires. Then, I started watching old episodes of Gossip Girl, and Dan and Serena's bus scene comes up. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, watch it.)

Hot much? Sooooo hot. Hot enough for my mind to start spinning its own forbidden, cherry-licking fantasies. 

Those are just two examples, but tons of magazines, hormones, music and moving pixels surround us daily, screaming 'SEX! Get yours today-- fast, easy and better than ever!' They're all triggers, driving us to crave sweaty, salty spontaneous risks, adrenaline rushes and thoughtless passion culminating in ultimate feral pleasure.

Hence, the appeal of a hookup. If all goes well, and everyone's on the same page, it seems pretty awesome. 

Yet, I have a bone to pick with my sex drive. I'm not sure how I feel about hookups. 

My non hypothetical question for you: Do hookups make you REALLY, SUPER happy? Like, truly just bubbling inside because you know that what you just did was incredibly fulfilling and passionately flamed with absolute respect and love for your partner, touching on a phenomenal spiritual connection that dwarfs your physical one? Probably not. Aside from seeming ridiculous, that type of experience is not the point. You know that when you wake up in the morning, this person won't be in your life anymore. Well, maybe -- but not like that. 

Yet, some people (ahem, Catholics, for sure) aspire to reach that spiritual level in sex. That's one reason why they put it on such a pedestal, forbidden and shameful for experimental, unwed teenagers to try attaining. However, I'm starting to think that that type of sex is very different from hook up sex -- different enough that they shouldn't be compared, but just put in their separate categories and let be. Okay, okay -- my complete inexperience with this subject renders my opinions fairly useless. But still. It makes a little sense, right? 

At this point in our lives, many of us don't have a steady significant other to share sex with in a meaningful way. Our lifestyles and goals are different than comparatively older couples. Is it so wrong to want to let loose some while we're young? What are we supposed to do with our sex drives? Let them rot there, and then leak their way into other parts of our bodies and brains, eventually to be manifested by changes in mood and general well-being? Maybe that's far-fetched, but I don't think so. 

I suppose I'm preaching sexual freedom. Never thought I'd do that. At the same time, I do believe that sex can be sacred and special and all that. I'm just not sure that the two are mutually exclusive, so I find it frustrating that people who do one assume that the other is wrong and inferior. Hence, the hyperboles of 'prude' or 'slut'. Can't we be both, or neither? 

Alright, it's late. I can't think anymore, from now on everything will be gibberish. haha, later guys. 


Ice Chewer is nineteen, female, straight and single.

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