Friday, February 29, 2008

Guest Contributor on a very good topic

April and Duncan have gotten extremely lazy with updating this little blog of theirs, and I think it’s about time someone brought it back to life. I want to write about a topic that I think gets brushed under the rug A LOT. That is, when a best friend gets a boy/girl friend, what happens to your relationship?

Now, I know that every person is an individual and that everyone acts differently in different situations and blah blah blah… BUT it can’t be denied that when your best friend gets a boy/girl friend, everything changes. All of the sudden, there’s a new person in that person’s life and the balance of things gets super altered. To make a chemistry reference, the chemical equation has to be fixed so that everything can remain stable and nobody feels like they’re being rejected.

The problem is that no matter what your best friend TRIES to do, somebody ends up missing out, which only causes further conflict. A classic dilemma is this: A friend is celebrating their birthday, but she/he can’t decide how they want to spend their big day. One the one hand, his/her friends want to throw a huge party, but on the other hand, their beau wants to have a special day with him/her. Or at the very least, they want some quality alone time. The point is that the friend is forced to choose between his/her friends or his/her dating partner. Ultimately, somebody is going to feel as though their companionship is not as valuable as somebody else’s.

So how does one exit this loop? Or at the very least avoid the pain that’s involved? Truthfully, I’m not quite sure but my theory is this: If you truly care about someone, you’ll let them explore new things and meet new people. Every so often, someone new will come into the picture and change things up, but if your relationship was strong and real in the first place, then in time, everything will come back into balance. Eventually, the new will turn into the typical, and life will continue onwards. If things don’t work out, then there’s always time to meet someone new. And as a good friend, you’ll be there when it happens.

Well, I don’t know about you, but I normally never read an entire entry because they’re just too damn long. So yes, I like to keep my entries short. Please tell April and Duncan to get off their butts and write updates for this thing…because this whole “writing a guest blog” endeavor was quiet tiring.

~ Written by a CCMWMV

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

It's not always a question of which to ditch, which to choose.
Balance is difficult for sure, but it's possible to find time for your friends as well as boy/girlfriend.
For the birthday example, one could go out to breakfast and spend the morning/early afternoon with all their friends and doing something with just their boy/girlfriend in the evening.
If both are important (as they should be), you just have to work a bit to keep all your special relationships going strong