I’m really pretty passionate about this topic: HONEST ≠ MEAN.

It really pisses me off when people aren’t straightforward with things that need to be straightforward. If someone likes you and they make it clear, it’s up to you to let them know how you feel, straight up. If you like them at first and then change your mind, it is DEFINITELY your responsibility to let them know, straight up. Otherwise, you’re leading them on, or continuing on with something that isn’t true anymore.

Of course, sometimes, the other person can detect your change of heart, but in my experience, they either a) don’t detect anything, b) are in denial about it, or c) misinterpret everything. So, my advice is to tell it like it is anyway. Just in case.

I’ve always been a big proponent of this. If someone likes you, and you don’t like them TELL THEM. Do not make them think there is a possibility that you could like them, don’t make them think you like them, and god forbid, do not be crazy flirtacious with them. It’s NOT MEAN to tell them the truth. You’re not breaking their heart; you’re letting them down early and quick and easy. If you keep going, leading them on, it’s going to be harder to let them down and the effects will be much worse. THAT will break their heart.

It just really annoys me when people say that they can’t let someone down because it would be too mean. It’s not mean. It’s honest and a helluva lot nicer than lying to them about how you feel. No one wants to be played.

And there’s absolutely nothing wrong in doing what you want because you’ll be happier with it. If you want to go for some girl, but you’re kind of committed to another, choose one, and let the other know immediately. Don’t woo two girls at once. Don’t feel like a jerk for switching girls too quickly, but definitely consider yourself a jackass if you aren’t upfront about it as soon as you know what you want.

Basically, don’t be afraid to hurt someone’s feelings. It’s how this stuff works. And remember that being honest is not being mean. Being mean is lying to yourself and everyone else about everything.